MY PERSPECTIVE, Gary Damron
We have a large family, 5 children and spouses, 15 grandchildren, 2 great-grands, and many siblings and extended family. Three weeks ago, we were meeting with a church group, and we commented that while many had experienced losses, we weren’t able to fully understand since all of our loved ones, from this generation down, were alive. The very next morning, that changed with a phone call from our youngest son.
Police officers had come in the night to notify him of the death of his oldest son, our 6th grandchild. There’s an ongoing investigation, but it appeared to be an accidental overdose, probably fentanyl. With that news, we joined tens of thousands of American families every year who lose a loved one to overdose.
His dad wrote that Austin was born two days before Christmas, a precious baby delivered to his parents in a Christmas stocking, the first of three sons. He attended school from kindergarten to graduation in the same school district, an athlete who played youth baseball, football, and soccer. In high school, Austin was a Missouri state qualifier in wrestling, good-looking, and he played various musical instruments.
As his grandma, I remembered so many things about the little blond boy - his voice, his smile, how he looked out for his brothers, his enthusiasm and outgoing spirit. All three of the brothers spent a week with us in Liberal in 2009, and each day we walked to Blue Bonnet Park for them to play. Even at the age of 9, Austin met a girl there, and the two of them would sit on top of the monkey bars, chatting and laughing. I wrote two Grandma Barbara stories that featured him: “Austin had Chinese food”, and “Oh, I want to glue and glitter!”
The second one was about him as a toddler, the first Christmas after 9/11, but it was penned only two years ago, out of a grandmother’s ache to remember her enthusiastic grandson. That little boy had grown up, he’d been in serious trouble, and in 2022 he was in the hospital after wrecking a car, as his path seemed to be spiraling downward. He did try treatment several times, and for many months he would make progress crawling out of the holes he’d found himself in. His family prayed for him, and concerned people intervened in a number of ways, but for a time he was living on the streets.
The last time we saw him was six weeks ago, when a bunch of family members gathered to celebrate two birthdays, and Austin got a ride to be there with us. He’d been out of drug rehab for a few months, and was working at a construction job he seemed to love. He let me take a photo of him, tall, thin, casually dressed, smiling, but with his lips closed to conceal the missing front tooth that we all knew bothered him.
His funeral was held September 22, 2024, with hundreds of people in attendance. It was clear that he and his family had many friends and supporters. The minister had experience with others from the same high school who have overdosed within the past four years, yet she managed to speak words of hope to all who came. One of Austin’s brothers wrote a tribute, recorded from prison where he is, remembering the good times when they were little. He also included the word “lost” 6 times, when talking of friends who’ve died, his brother who was no longer with him, and years he himself has been lost in the system. Dylan included a touching prayer, and warnings about Satan and drugs and consequences. He ended by saying he wanted to do something “for all the lost brothers”.
Anyone who’s dealt with addictions, either personally or from the standpoint of watching a loved one, could tell a similar story. We grieve for at least two generations who’ve been lost, through death or impairment, from leading the life God intended for them.
Gary was able to speak at Austin’s service, and commented that this culture isn’t the one we grew up in, or even that our kids grew up in. There are so many temptations out there. The world will tell us this will make you happy, this will do this or do that. It doesn’t - it just wants to hook you, and it doesn’t want to turn you loose.
Jesus told Zacchaeus after he climbed down from the sycamore tree, “’For the Son of Man has come to seek and to save that which was lost’” (Luke 19:10). For anyone who hasn’t started down the path, stay away from the lifestyle and the people involved in promoting drugs. If you’re in that now, turn to Jesus, and allow Him to lead you out of it, with the help of trained professionals. If you’ve lost someone to the horror, Jesus can bring healing and peace in the midst of the tragedy.
We’re thankful for the last few months that Austin had. In some ways, they helped prepare us for this great loss, while making it in another way even more senseless. We continue to trust each of our children and grandchildren to God’s grace and care.
